According to the American Psychological Association (APA), the most commonly used strategies for dealing with stress are those that activate the brain's reward system : eating, drinking, shopping, watching television, surfing the internet, and playing video games. And why not? Dopamine promises us that we're going to feel good. It's only natural that we turn to the biggest dopamine releasers when we want to feel better. Call it the promise of relief.
The promise of reward - as we've seen - does not always mean that we will feel good. More often, the things we turn to for relief end up turning on us. The APA's national survey on stress found that the most commonly used strategies were also rated as highly ineffective by the same people who reported using them.
If we want to avoid such stress-induced willpower failures, we'll need to find a way to feel better that doesn't require turning to temptation. We'll also need to give up the self control strategies - like guilt and self-criticism - that only make us feel worse.
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